Now our passage brings our focus back to the way this all plays out in our walk, our manner of living. It simply directs husbands to love their wives and wives to respect their husbands.
Many have pointed out the difference in the directive to husbands (to Love) and the directive to wives (to respect) saying that women respond to, or need, Love and men respond to, or need, respect. I can sure affirm that respect is a primary way in which I perceive Love.
Christ, we are told, gave Himself up so that His bride would be set apart, made perfectly clean (as 1 John 1:9 puts it, cleansed from all unrighteousness, which leaves her righteous), glorious, spotless, youthfully beautiful, pure, and perfect.
He did it all for His bride. He did it for her benefit so that she would be all that she was designed by God to be.
I bet there isn’t a husband here who doesn’t want that for his wife. I bet there isn’t a wife here who doesn’t want that for her husband. And that is the point of submission.
Some of us have heard the comment, meant to be humorous, “I told her I loved her when we got married. If anything changes, I’ll let her know.” Many of us who share the typical male proclivities may almost naturally think that if we provide for our wives and protect them, we are demonstrating love. But there is a far greater depth of meaning here.
There’s this one word that causes great discomfort to many. It’s the word “head.” To ears sensitized to any hint of subservience and always on the lookout for signs of possible abuse, the idea that one member of the marital union is called “the head” to which the other is to subject themself can seem off-putting, even offensive. It can feel risky in the extreme.
